---

This is part of Cleavage Girl's blog. She works in the underground complex known as "Cheney's Bunker" or just "The Bunker". We are privileged that she has agreed to let the Striporama carry her first person accounts of life as a superhero in the Bunker.

---

January 3 Dear Computer, Richard Perle has been given the job of subduing the heathen on a planet in a distant galaxy by his cohort, the Wolfowitch. In his capacity as cohort, he has assumed the identity of The Black Perle, lover of democracy, large contracts, and shady nogoodnick arms dealers. To get in shape for his task, he has had a treadmill outfitted with the latest military technology, allowing him to target ugly green aliens from the comfort of the Tri-Lateral gym. Lynne Cheney and Joe Lieberman were so delighted with the machine, that they had similar ones custom made for themselves. Now when you walk by the gym, it sounds a lot like a video arcade, except, of course, the sound is of real weapons. January 4 Dear Computer, Like every caped crusader, The Black Perle set up his very own secret headquarters where his government funded activites could proceed in peace and quiet. Built by the Balrog, Frown and Boot division of the Pallihurton Corporation, the building itself is on the corner of Bush 41 and Bush 43 in Cheney's Bunker. There's a Chinese deli nearby and a store owned by Turks that sells Persian rugs. Down the street a bit is a Pallihurton outlet where currently there's a warhead sale in progress. The Black Perle picked up a few thousand on the way to his first day at work at his new headquarters. "I'll sell them to a few of my intergalactic shell companies before having the government buy them to use in their war agains the space aliens," he was probably thinking, because in the end, that's just what he did. January 8 Dear Computer, Richard Perle has given me the job of shaking down reluctant legislators who might not support his vision of "A world at peace; a world governed by law; a world in which all peoples are free to find their own destinies: That dream has not yet come true, but if it ever does come true, it will be brought into being by American might and defended by American might, too." "Cough up the money for Perle's dream," I say until they start agreeing to almost anything. I can be really convincing when I want to be. January 10 Dear Computer, I did so well as a lobbyist working for The Black Perle, that he decided to let me anchor my very own news program on CNN, The Superhero News, which is sponsored by Trireme Associates. My very first interview was with the Administration official who outed Joseph Wilson's wife to reporter Robert Novak. January 12 Dear Computer, The Black Perle came on my television show, The Superhero News, this afternoon in order to promote the book he co-wrote with David Frum, "An end to Evil: How to Win the War on Terror". To condense this book down to its essence, let's just say that if it were a book of recipes, we'd be eating Military Industrial Complex for the rest of our lives. January 16 Dear Computer, My first week as anchor of The Superhero News went so well, that The Black Perle offered to sell me a piece of the Martian landscape in anticipation of the coming real estate boom on Mars. I have a GREAT BOSS!